Larisa’s latest post inspired me. In it, she comes out and admits that she is no longer in her teens, that she’s a mother, and is proud to be both. Good for her. I’ve always looked at MMOs as they great equalizer. In them, we can be whoever we want to be. No one need know that you’re 13 or 35, unless you want them to. The fact is, however, I feel like I’m the minority in this. A lot of people will judge you by how old you are, for better or worse, without ever having spoken to you.
To the Younger Players
I feel bad for you. There are a lot of guilds that won’t even hear you out when you apply. If you’re not 18, I’m sorry, you’re out. Quite frankly, I think that’s a stupid attitude to take.
Take Riknas for example. Riknas is 17 but you would never know it from listening to him on our show. I’ve been told over and over again that he carries himself better than many adults and it’s true. There is no reason, none, why he should be rejected for a guild spot over an older person.
The problem is, there’s a stigma. Cliches like “teen angst” and “high school drama” hang over your head at all times. It’s an uphill battle against the stereotypes your less mature peers have made for you. My advice? Hold your chin high. Type legibly. Don’t make sex jokes or talk about how drunk you are. In short, pretend to be your grandmother. It will work wonders.
There’s no easy way around it. The only way to beat bigotry is to prove the bigoted wrong.
To the Older Players
Kudos to you for being online and playing some games. I have a lot of respect for older players – in this case, let’s say 38+ years old. You step into a wading pool that you know ahead of time will probably be filled with people of a younger generation. But you come anyways, find fun where it is to be had, and stake your flag. I’m proud to be friends with many of you. Stake the flag where many older people simply reject in technophobia.
I also understand why many of your guilds have an 18+ policy for new members. It makes sense, doesn’t it? Teenagers are more prone to emotional turmoil, ergo drama, and immaturity. It’s part of growing up– and who wants drama in their guild?
But, I’m afraid that I think it’s all pretty prejudiced. Many younger people rise above the chaff of their generation. Little known fact: most of them don’t want drama any more than you do. The truth is, a big part of the drama generated in guilds has little to nothing to do with age. It’s about situation and circumstance. Be selective about who you invite, sure, but give the younger people a chance. You’ll get some who surprise you.
My Own Rejection
It may come as a surprise that I’ve recently felt the sting of being too young in a game. I’m 23 years old, a college graduate, substitute teacher, and husband. I’ve worked with millions of dollars in my time with Chase and manage enough responsibility for any 40 year old out there. And yet, despite all of this, I’m too young to join The Older Gamers.
I appreciate their reasons. Guilds are about identifying with fellow members. In this case, I don’t meet what they’re looking for. I am not an older gamer, just two years shy. But it still stings a little bit to feel too young for something. I haven’t been too young for anything in the last two years.
It brought me right back to 17 again, where Riknas and so many others are. Saying that only 18 year olds and older can apply to join your guild makes all of those potential applicants feel insulted – you’ve called them immature before they’ve even said hello. I think we can all get that.
The thing to remember, I think, is that we’ve all been young and we will all be old in time, as well. No one is immune to the track of life. At 18, would you have wanted to be rejected? And, if you’re under that now, would you want to join a guild of 12 year olds? Probably not, but I’d hope you’d hear out the 12 year old applying to your guild.
Honestly, I’m not that upset about not being able to join The Older Gamers. Maybe sometime, I will. But, for now, you’re one step closer to death than me. 😉
Kidding! Now, let’s forget all this “she’s just too old for you” stuff and kill a raid boss.
Thoughts for a Tuesday.
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