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An Update on Real Life (or, why haven’t I been writing lately?)

Bear with me here, because I know a lot of you only stop by to read about gaming. That’s cool. I like to think some of you may have noticed my lack of updates though and might care what’s going on. It bears a little explanation. It’s been rough patch, all, and that’s putting it lightly.

This last week has been a little more than crazy. We’ve had taxes to do, mid-terms to study for and lose sleep over, a washer/dryer to shop for, and trying to find the best value in an HDTV for $500 – which is a lot more confusing than you’d think when you’re starting from scratch. I’ve also been substituting more and even got to teach P.E. yesterday with 6th-8th graders.  That takes us up to, say, Tuesday for the mundane stuff? But that’s about the least of it.

My step-father had a heart attack on Monday and landed in the ICU. He had fluid built up around his heart when it actually happened, so he could barely breathe. At about 2AM in the morning, he was able to get enough breath to wake my mother up to call the ambulance.

My mother and sister are having a hard time with it. Just today, my sister found out the extent of what’s going on and seems to be avoiding going to the hospital to see him (she’s scared of seeing her dad that way). And me? I’ve been putting up a strong face because that’s how I’ve learned to handle things.

He’s had heart attacks before (lifelong smoker, even though we’ve tried everything, everything, to get him to quit), so this isn’t exactly new. Or, that’s what I tried to think. The truth is, his health has been getting worse over the years and, no matter how much I try to forget it or not notice, there’s no denying. This was probably his most serious heart attack to date, in an already weakened state, with extra problems that came up as a result.

My sister reads this blog, so here’s the important part (Katie, if you’re seeing this, pay attention): he’s doing better now. They have him stabilized and there are a couple of options his doctors are looking at. He’s still in the ICU though and, until he’s out, things are going to remain tough.

I’ll be honest. I hate this. I hate that we’ve been in this state of perpetual fear before. I hate that it’s all about the not knowing and the what-ifs. And I hate that I can try to push it off for only so long before the reality of it all hits home.

More than anything, I hate cigarettes and that they’ve cut years and years off of my step-dad’s life.

Did I mention he’s in his forties? Or that this marks his tenth, no joke, tenth heart attack, not to mention the angina that’s occurred over the years as well? Or that he’s had open heart surgery already? That he avoids going to the hospital for the inevitable fear it strikes into everyone?

All of this I’ve known, and dealt with, and tried to forget (we all have), over the last 15 years.

We’ll pull out of this one. I know that. Katie, I hope you know that. Things will be okay and God will take care of us, no matter what.

But it still sucks.

So that’s why you haven’t seen me lately. I have been gaming, to some degree, to get away from things, but my focus has been on real life this week. Gaming has been short, too. No MMOs. Ten minutes here, ten minutes there, before it’s back to whatever life has for me at the moment.

So, I apologize that it’s been slow around here. Things should be back to normal soon. I’m hoping we can get my step-father home within the next couple of days and mid-terms are now behind me. In other words, I’m really hoping things can get back to normal soon.

In the meantime, consider signing up for an RSS service like Google Reader (it works with your Google account) and subscribing to the feed over on the right. That’ll make sure you’ll know as soon as my next post goes up. Hopefully, tomorrow, and, hopefully, it’ll end this two-week dry spell life has caused.

Oh, and one last thing. If you could, send up your well wishes to whatever you believe in. It would mean a lot to my family. It’s important for my sister to know that being scared is okay. It’s love that matters, and that everything will be alright.

Thanks,

Chris

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